We talked to luli akram on everything adoption

Since leh la2 2 the topic of adoption has been on our minds and we wanted to hear genuine answers from someone we trust so we talked to @Luli.akram one of the first people who raised awareness and educated society on every thing adoption.

What encouraged you to talk about this topic in specific?

Since high school, I knew I was going to adopt. But I could not do that due to multiple obstacles including that I didn’t find my daughter yet. From how nagging the problem is in my life, I decided that I should at least be raising awareness.

What are the challenges that mothers and their adoptive kids go through?

Up till now, I did not face any challenges because thank god, I am lucky enough to be surrounded by a supportive community. My workmates, my friends, my parents, all support me. I do not know where I will be in the future and I do not know what my daughter will face. Yet for now, I am okay. On the other hand, there are different people, from different communities in Egypt that suffer from persecution, severe reactions from their parents and neighbors which is very unfortunate.

What are the most frequently asked questions about the issue?

Some of the frequently asked questions are: do you love them equally? do you really feel like she is your daughter? Of course, the answer to both would be yes! I get a lot of questions asking about the steps for adoption? a lot too!

Do you believe people are starting to be okay with الاحتضان or do we need to talk more about it?

Definitely, we need to talk more about adoption; by the way, I do not call it الاحتضان at all. I do not even like this word because I like to call things by their names; still, people are okay with it. That is why certainly we need to talk about this topic for a lot of years. Many rules need to be changed and already some rules are changing which is a blessing however I am sure that there are even more things that will improve in the future.

What advice would you give to a new mother who is adopting a kid?

Not different from the normal advice I would give to any mother. The most important thing is not to treat the adopted kid a special treatment as if he has a problem in his life. No, he does not have any problem! There are psychiatrists and psychologists to help you with treating him but do not make up a story yourself of the adopted child having a problem and believe it. Then when he turns out to be spoiled in the future from your pampering, it will be your fault.

Why do you think people might talk badly about someone who is adopting in Egypt?

People hate what they do not understand. People hate what they are not capable of doing. So when they find out that someone took the extra mile and did something they did not do, they insult him and badmouth him.

Did you have any doubts about adopting your daughter or were you always sure about taking this step?

No one will ever be sure of taking the step whether for adoption or having a biological child. Most mothers get pregnant then regret it and wonder how did they do this too themselves. I did not have doubts about my daughter but I doubted myself. Am I capable of being the mother of 2? When I met her, I felt there is no turning back. I saw something that I cannot unsee

Written by: Nadia Ashraf

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